Thursday, December 30, 2010
HATE & LOVE come together.
Quite bored today,went to polyclinic this morning but in the end the queue also quite long already and some more the doctor is the same doctor i saw last time when i went to polyclinic for the same problem! Damn it. Went to AMK after that to do something which is kinda important to me... After that bloody wait for 2 PERSON for 2 FREAKING HOURS AT JE!
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ONE WORD TO SAY ABOUT THIS RED WINE! SUCKS! I mean frankly,first the after taste sucks. Second the smell of the red wine was not bad,but the taste sucks. Lastly the promoter told me it was semi-sweet but i don't think it's semi-sweet. So one word about "River Breeze",it sucks to the point i had to "force" myself to drink it down. Ok force is a bad word,well but it's still my choice to buy it so i'll have to live with the consequence of it. But well what do you expect from a Red Wine that only cost $16 and bought at Giant? This prove you pay for what you get.
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Stop looking back is the stupidest words to me,because i'm still living in the past.
Someone told me this today. Ben,things had already passed so long. Move on in life okey? My reply? I told him this,don't worry cause i ain't looking back? Because i still am living in the past. =). I know i seriously pissed him off but this's the truth my friend...
Back at Sudden Attack. Somehow i feel myself getting more and more better now. Still having insomnia and depending on sleeping pill to sleep at night.
Maybe i am stupid but i still am hoping you would tell me yourself... But i know that won't happen. Maybe destiiny is playing with me once again. Maybe leaving is the best choice in my life... But can i ever say goodbye to you?
Monday, December 27, 2010
Anger lead to Sadness lead to Hate and more Sadness and more Anger.
Anger and Sadness. Both mix together and you'll get only HATE. In the past i always wonder how hate come about. I never really hate anything so much,well maybe except for myself? I almost forgot the reason why i hate about myself. ALMOST. But thanks to certain events that's happening recently,i finally remember why i hate myself rather then hating the world.
Couldn't sleep for 1 week. Need to depend on sleeping pill to sleep.
Friday, December 24, 2010
Love is the root of all the pain.
Seriously why the hell am i hoping for?
Since when do i believe in miracle?
Since when i start to care so much?
Am i the bad guy in your life?
Do you really hate me that much?
Maybe the decision i made 1 year back is right?
But can i really do it when the time come?
Can i really just escape reality and just walk out of your life?
Is it the only choice i am left with now?
Is there a better choice that i could made without hurting you?
Or rather is the decision i made will affect you or not?
Maybe i am just a tissue in your life?
I have served my purpose in your life and now it's time for me to leave?
Maybe some feeling can never be spoken out and should never be?
because it's unspoken that's why it's more beautiful...
Time flies.
People changes.
But there are always things that'll never changes.
That'll be memories that will always be there somewhere within your heart.
It can never be erase from within you no matter how much you try to do so.
because those memories are beautiful to you...
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Because we chose the wrong path in the past,we knew which is the right path now.
C'mas is coming.. This year it's a ORANGE C'mas! Frankly i don't know what is an orange c'mas. Anybody can tell me? Hahas,talking to myself sia! As if got people reading my blog...
Last Friday was the last day of school. Now i'm having holiday!!! WooHoo. Basically went to JP after school on friday. Bought a box of choco for lijuan. She say she was joking when she asked for c'mas present,but i still bought it for her in the end. LOLs.
At friday night. Cousin wedding night at Suntec Convection Centre. Frankly i thought at first since it was suntec so i doubt much people will be dressing formal so i really didn't think much and was planning to just wear a long sleeve tshirt. But get scolded by my mom saying dress till so informal,then in the end changed again! WASTE TIME! But lucky i changed!! Everybody was like dress till so FORMAL! Lucky i didn't make a fool out of myself that night! Grand wedding that night,so nice. OHYA! That night got RED WINE! ARGH!!! I wanna drink it!! BUT!! My mom beside me can't even drink. WORST! My cousin put a cup of red wine infront of me!!! DAMN IT MAN! The smell of red wine so nice!!! But can only smell can't drink!! It's like a torture to me the whole night!! "FAINT" So wanna drink it!
BASICALLY! I'm a failure! I went for my driving test evaluation today! 20th i need go for BTT and i still haven't pass my evaluation! I was so damn confident that i can pass in 1 shot. In the end both try also fail! Damn it. I only needed 1 more question correct to pass it for both tries!! ARGH!!! Monday morning gonna go try taking it once more. If i can't pass it tomorrow then i can't take my test! Then must put back and the next early slot i see is during MID FEB! "FAINT". Why am i so unlucky? Someone tell me WHY!? Friday unlucky. Saturday unlucky. Sunday also unlucky. PRAY THAT TOMORROW I JUST NEED TO BE LUCKY FOR THE EVALUATION. PRAY! PRAY! PRAY!
don't ask me why,because i can't give you a answer why.
don't ask me how,because even i also don't know how.
don't ask me where,because i'm also looking for it.
don't ask me when,because i want to know when too.
all i know is WHAT.
all i know is WHO.
but on the other hand,i choose not to know WHY...
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Not all feeling are shown,some are hidden deep inside of ones.
I don't know why but at time it really feel sucks about things. Why does the one always get wronged when one's is the one trying to help someone? At time even when you know that you're being wronged you couldn't do or say anything about it. All you can do is hate it,hate that the fact that you care so much for someone. Hate that the fact that you know that something bad is going to happen and all you can do is see that person sink deeper and deeper down...
HMM,AHWAN! =)
hahas,shocked?=P.
i want to thanks this special person in my life.
her name is wanyee aka ahwan! =)
thanks for being by my side and listening to all my problem which i can't tell anyone.
you know me the best ar =)
at time even before i said anything you already knew that i was feeling down to the max.
but i know i can't do much for you.
THAT'S WHY ALL I CAN SAY IS....
THANKS YOU AHWAN!
Saturday, December 4, 2010
The heart of a cyclone is in the middle.
Just like human,the core of human is FEELING.
Why the hell am i down here feeling so fucking pissed off for when YOU don't even listen to what i said to YOU in the past? HUH WHY! WHY!? fuck! FUCK! fuck!
Really feel sorry to a certain someone...I kept saying to her i would be alright,i would be alright.But in the end i'm still struck at that same FUCKING lousy place alone.
I can't say the name out cause lazy also,but i think she know who she is and i just want to say SORRY for only smsin u when i'm down ba?Next time when i sms u,i promise it'll be about good news!
Can't stop myself for thinking about things,really need someone to talk to now like BADLY!
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